Wednesday, November 29, 2017

Vegan Cheese Ball

This year was my very first Thanksgiving as a vegan, but that didn't mean that I was about to miss out on one of my favorites of the holiday season.  This brings my to my vegan cheese ball experiment, which I am happy to say was a huge success.  For this recipe, I simply took the recipe that my mom has used for years, and made it vegan.  Super easy and absolutely delicious.  

8 oz Cream Cheese (I used Kite Hill plain)
1/2 teaspoon Worcester sauce 
1/2 teaspoon seasoning salt 
1 tablespoon chopped chives 
1/2 teaspoon onion salt (I used Trader Joe's)
1 1/2 tablespoon ranch (I used follow your heart)
1/2 cup shredded cheese (I used daiya shreds)
1/2 cup vegan jerky shredded 
optional green onions
 *I put the jerky in a food processor to shred it

Combine all ingredients in a bowl and mix until combined.  If you feel so inclined and plan on sharing this with other people, you can shape it into a fancy ball...I'll be honest though, if I make it again just for me, I am eating this sucker right out of the bowl.  I do recommend topping with the green onions though, it really adds a nice touch to this dip.  I hope that you enjoy this! Definitely let me know if you make this! You can tag me online at @madenewco, @ttablog, or @selfcarevegan - I am behind all of them! :) 


Wednesday, October 11, 2017

I Am Alive, But She Isn't

The Rebuild family has entered into a season of heartbreak, one of our dearest friends has overdosed.  The heartache is still so fresh that the words just won't come, but there are some things that I have been pouring over that I want to talk about today.  Writing these things helps me to think through them, I don't like to sensor my thoughts here, so I will pour them out for you here and hope that you accept them with grace and understanding.   

In the past few days, I have been pouring over old messages that we had together and there is an overwhelming theme, my friend loved Jesus with all her heart.  She also loved encouraging me.  The photo above is one of those messages.  I had hit a really dark time, and we were talking about it.  We often talked about my darkness.  We talked about mine and we talked about hers.  We also talked about the light. She was my friend, so I didn't have to hold back.  She understood and she delivered words of wisdom to me.  In our messages like these, a common theme was that we were alive.  At one point she said "we are clean, we are sober, and we are alive".  She told me that this all has to mean something.  We repeatedly took the gift of life that we were given and we threw it back into God's face, but He left us here.  He wasn't ready for us yet, despite our best efforts.  Why? What are supposed to do with that? 

This past week, God was ready for Kayla.  She knew Him.  She is still moving mountains.  She is a perfectly flawed daughter of God. Nothing less.  Her soul is not meant for eternal damnation! Praise the Lord for that! 

He was ready for her this time, and that has to mean something.  

He left me here, and that has to mean something too. 

I don't know what to do with that.   

I am clean, I am sober, and I am alive.  That has to mean something.  It does mean something.  There is a reason that I am still here.  I am alive.  

When Kayla was here, she lived fully alive.  Anyone who knew her can tell you that.  She lived her life to the fullest.  She lived alive, and I want to live alive too.  Her death will not be in vain. 

We are all alive, and that has to mean something....

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Evidence Of Grace

"Here is what we believe to be some very good news: If you’re reading this, if there’s air in your lungs on this November day, then there is still hope for you. Your story is still going. And maybe some things are true for all of us. Perhaps we all relate to pain. Perhaps we all relate to fear and loss and questions. And perhaps we all deserve to be honest, we all deserve whatever help we need. Our stories are all so many things: Heavy and light. Beautiful and difficult. Hopeful and uncertain. But our stories aren’t finished yet. There is still time, for things to heal, change, and grow. There is still time to be surprised. We are stories still going, you and I. We are stories still going."


As I was sitting in counseling a few weeks ago we were talking about the kingdom value of sharing your story. People these days love to talk about stories, how we are all living them.  People talk about how there are chapters to your story.  As a culture we love a good story.  Even if you look at marketing you can tell we are a society driven by stories.  However, I think when it comes to kingdom value, our stories are so very important. Back in my youth group days, it used to be called a testimony.  The story of how you came to Jesus, or how Jesus saved you.  The problem is, is that for so often, so many of us simply saw our testimony as a stand alone event.  As in, I came to Jesus, He saved me, now I'm good.  

The problem is, is that so often rescue and recovery is not a single, once-then-done, event. 

The sacrifice that provided our eternal rescue, that was one sacrifice for all for eternity. But our everyday growth, it's just that, every day.  

It's an often used phrase, but it's true, "we are stories still going".  We require much grace and rescue every single day.  

So this leads me to the original thought behind this post.  I, for so often, believed that I couldn't tell my story, or my story wasn't even worth telling, until it was perfect.  Until it was finished.  I thought that a story of rescue wasn't rescue if it wasn't complete.  But that isn't true is it.  Christ, in his infinite mercy and grace, is saving me and redeeming my story every second of every day.  I may still struggle.  My story may still royally blow some days  most days.  However, one look at my story and the evidence of grace is written all over it.  Look at the story of anyone who is in Christ, and you will find the same thing.  The message of rescue is present in everyone who has been rescued, and we have all been rescued haven't we.  

I am doing a bible study right now from IF that is about telling your story of redemption, and I struggle with it.  Not because I don't believe it, but because I know it's true.  Hiding my story of rescue comes naturally to me.  I love this perfectly crafted image I have built of myself.  I don't want to be broken.  I don't want to show my weakness, but that is what I have felt convicted to do.  It is so easy to keep living behind this image of who I appear to be.  I like that person. People like her, people think she is great, people admire her.  Who wouldn't want that, right? I guess what I am saying is, is that I don't, or rather can't, be that person anymore.  God has rescued me, and if telling people about that brings them to Him, or even gives them a glimpse of His infinite grace and mercy, then how can I keep that to myself? 

My story is still messy, but today is a different chapter.  

The evidence of His grace is the fact that I am still not where I used to be.  

The evidence of His grace is the fact that I am still here.  

I've made progress, that is proof of the rescue.  I may still get depressed, but I don't think about dying anymore.  I may still cut every once in awhile, but it is so much significantly less often than it was.  I am still anxious, goodness I am still anxious, but it's better.  I still go to counseling and do the work, but I have to go less often than I did when I first admitted I needed it.  I am more open and vulnerable, still need to work on that more for sure though. My obsessive need to do things, it's practically gone.  My life is completely changed.  I am still here for crying out loud, how great is His mercy and grace!

I haven't moved into the next chapter yet, but this is definitely not the chapter I was living before.

How can I keep that victory to myself.  It would be an injustice to the people around me.  Perhaps more importantly, in doing so, I am not giving glory to Him.  My goal should always be to give the glory back to Him in everything that I do.  He demands glory.  

So, I will speak.

I will tell my story. 

I don't quite know how this will work.  I mean it isn't the most natural to just go up to someone and talk about how you used to want to die is it? So for now, if someone asks, I will share my chapter.  I will point to rescue, I will point to the evidence of His grace.  I'll give Him the glory.  

Friday, April 21, 2017

Feel Too Much

So here I am, lying in bed at 2 in the morning, thinking those deep thoughts once again. I don't know that many of my thoughts make much sense at all, and my eyes are getting continually more heavy, so bear with me while I spew out my random musings tonight.

I just finished the book If You Feel Too Much by Jamie Tworkowski, and tonight I was reading in another book and admiring the way both authors sees things. Similar to myself really. To sometimes feel like weight of all the things at once. To see a sunset and at once be filled with joy and worship, while simultaneously pondering things like the complexity of life. I feel like in my mind, nothing is simple. Everything feels deep and complex and too much.

Part of me wonders if my brain is just wired differently. Does everyone feel these things? I honestly don't have the answer to that question, but it's one of those things that pop into your head when you are trying to sleep.

Sometimes it is a nightmare to feel too much, but so many times it is also a beautiful gift.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

The Cross Has The Final Word

I am lying here in bed, trying to get some sleep, but I can't stop running over the details of this blessed day. This Lenten season, some of us from Rebuild have been participating in Holy Week services at different churches in our community, and tonight was no different. It was a beautiful service full of reminders of His mercy. We observed foot washing and communion.  It was a beautiful and blessed night. It was different than what I am used to, but I think that that made it all the more stunning to me. I couldn't 'phone it in', I listened, and boy did my heart listen tonight.

It hasn't just been this evening. This entire Lenten season has been beautiful. Part of me wishes that it didn't have to end. I suppose it doesn't have to really. I think that I love the intentionality of it.  It peels back the layers of our busy lives and allows us to remember who has been at the center of it all along. It's a quiet meditation.  This week has been full of beautiful reminders, and I can't recall a time that I have enjoyed Easter with this much passion and love for Jesus flowing out of me.

Tonight, I was in the stillness, listening to songs about the cross. I listened to songs that kept repeating over and over the same message, and suddenly it hit me right in the heart. That moment, the it is finished moment, what a stunning sacrifice. I was overwhelmed with the love. I wanted the throw my hands in the air right then and there, the love of our savior for me, I can't even fathom it. I just love Jesus so much. One song lyric that really stuck with me was "evil may put up the strongest fight, but the Cross has the final word." Talk about a victory people! I mean come on! When He proclaimed with His dying breath, it is finished, the gravity of what that really means, I can't even begin to fathom it. The love and the mercy that He has for us. He paid it all!

 I heard someone say that the only reason we can call it Good Friday is because we look at it through the lens of Sunday...but I think that sometimes we forget the weight of Friday. It was bloody and filled with grief. He took the weight of our sins upon Himself and was separated from the Father. I am in awe of His mercy tonight. It's Friday, but Sunday is coming!

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Thank God For Grace

"I'll never understand why He takes people who are so much better
 than me and He leaves me here" 

Tonight at Rebuild Church, I heard someone say these words, and instantly, I felt the weight of them.  My heart broke for the woman that said this.  My heart didn't break because she was such a worse sinner than I was, my heart broke because I am her, we are all her. Every single one of us in this world has thought these things, and that is why I have to write this today. I have to write them for you, dear reader, and I have to write them for myself.  Not a day goes by that I don't sin, and while my sin might look different than my friends, it is not worse. Not a single one of us is perfect, and every single one of us deserves death, that is where the beauty of His sacrifice, His mercy, and His grace come pouring in and flooding every corner of our brokenness.  My heart broke for her because she cannot fathom the love that the Father has for her and for every single one of his children. We cannot sin our way out of the scope of His love.  

She got part of it right, because of our sin, we all deserve death.  However, not a single one of us is any more deserving of life than anyone else, and the same goes for grace, love, mercy.  We cannot out sin grace.  We can out sin holiness, but never grace.  It is never ending.  So she was right in this regard, we all deserve death.  We all deserve consequences for our sin.  After all, the wages of sin is death. Thank God for the precious gift of forgiveness and eternal life.  Now, I can not speak to whether or not this friend of mine actually knows Jesus, but I pray she will.  There are plenty of people out there who also share this same broken spirit about their sin, and I hope that they can discover His grace as well.  

These words also called my mind the unspoken hierarchy of sins in the collective church today.  According to this false set of standards, sure, some of us have pretty bad sins.  Some of us have terrible sins.  Maybe your sin is one of those church sanctioned sins.  The ones that are not really alright, but we let it slip by because, hey, everyone sins a little right.  While I cannot speak to the heart of the person who said these words tonight, I can imagine that she has heard about our false hierarchy of sins.  I can imagine that some of her sins are not on the church sanctioned list.  I know that some of my sins are not on the church sanctioned list.  I also know that this list is a load of nonsense.  How dare we categorize each other, just to ease our own conscience.  The severity of someone else's sin doesn't redeem your 'little' sin.  How dare we put the grace and sacrifice of Jesus into a box.  He is enough for her sins.  He is enough for all sins.  His sacrifice is enough for addiction, gossip, theft, doubt, attempted suicide, laziness, murder, hate, and any other sin that you can think of.  He hates all of it.  He is enough to cover it.  In the eyes of God, these are all the same.  So when my friend says that she is more deserving of death than someone else, it breaks my heart.  We are all born broken, every last one of us.

Just keep pouring out grace today.  Just keep pointing your neighbors to Jesus today.  His grace is enough.  His love is deep enough for you.  

Sunday, March 19, 2017

He Is Still Good

With the arrival of this lent season, I have been focused more and more on turning my heart to Jesus.  However, at Rebuild, we have also encountered a season of darkness.  Without going into too many details because of the security and safety of my friends, it is safe to say that Satan is after several of our family...and it blows. Especially since we had just finished up with our IF:Gathering and people were so focused on God.  We had just sat on the porch and talked for hours about Jesus on Thursday. Then when the sun rose on Friday, loving on Jesus wasn't as easy.  It is times like these that He feels silent and while you know He is still good, there is a voice in the back of your brain that whispers that He isn't.

I think that questions like these are one hundred percent natural in the face of tragedy.

I think that the true test is what we do with those questions.

He is, always was, and always will be good.

How refreshing is that today.  How much we can rest in that.

It isn't even in His nature to not be good.

He is always good.

He cannot and will not fail you

So while, today, things may feel like they are falling apart. We rest in a God who is always in control, always knows what He is doing, and is always good.

He isn't afraid of your questions, so ask them.  When life gets tough and He doesn't seem to be there anymore, talk to Him. Never turn your back on Him, and continue to trust Him...but He is not afraid of your questions.  Perhaps these circumstances are a test to draw you deeper into relationship with Him.  He is still good, even when life isn't.

Sabbath Song

Monday, February 27, 2017

My Image Is My Idol


Last night, I was all up in my head.  I was feeling all kinds of anxiety, and I had no idea why.  I was being filled, and I was pumped up on Jesus.  I had just been to a Christian business leaders meeting and to a community prayer breakfast, and they were both amazingly filling and a blessed time, so why was I feeling anxious and less than.  I could not for life of me keep my eyes fixed on Jesus all day. Shower time is when I am most tempted and most attacked, in that quiet space where Satan can invade my thoughts.  It was then that I cried out.  In that moment a passage popped into my head...1 Samuel 5-7.  Initially I was sure it was nothing, I mean it came out of absolutely nowhere. Nevertheless, I hopped right out of the shower and grabbed my phone to look up that is what I found....

"Then Samuel said to all of the people of Israel, "If you want to return to the Lord with all your hearts, get rid of your foreign gods and your images of Ashtoreth.  Turn your hearts to the Lord and obey him alone; then He will rescue you from the Philistines."

Much of the passage that popped into my head was about what was happening with the ark of the covenant, but it is also about the people of Israel wanting to be delivered from the Philistines. However, this particular verse really struck me.  Get rid of your gods and images and turn your hearts to God, then He will rescue you.  

What struck me the most was the bit about image, so I started thinking over it. I kept coming back to it over and over again over the next day, and I realized something.  My image and how I look to the world, it has become an idol.  I am far too concerned with how the world views me, and not nearly concerned enough with what God thinks of me.  How backwards is that?  In reality, how God views me should be the only reputation I should be concerned about, and the beauty of it is that what He sees me as never changes.  He loves me, and His love never changes. He calls me forgiven, chosen, and redeemed. He calls me so many things, but I am so much more concerned in my day to day with how I look to the people around me.  Now, I am by far from over this idol, I can't change all the behaviors I have picked up overnight, but I can recognize that it is a problem, and I can acknowledge the idol and repent of it.  

My image is my idol.  The real problem with this is that I am far too concerned with pride to be living my life and my testimony out loud for Jesus.  I am too afraid to own up to my past and tell people about God's saving grace, because I am far too concerned with how it will make me look.  I feel that God has been calling me to be much more vocal about my testimony, but the idea of that freaks me out, I don't want to do it.  So I have been resisting, image could be wrecked.  I like being a 'good Christian'.  It is so much fun isn't it?  I like it when people think I do good things. I like it when people talk about all the good I do.  Thanks a lot stupid pride! Oh how my ego is stroked when people are proud of me.  It's addicting.  It is also people pleasing, and I don't want that to be my reality.  God can do so much more with my story, if I would just sit down my pride and my image and walk towards him.  It isn't comfortable, but it will be worth it.  

It will be worth it...I just need to keep telling myself that....

If only we could wake up every single day keenly aware of the reality of who God says that we are...we would live so much more free wouldn't we?  

...return to the Lord with all your hearts... 

...then He will rescue you....

I sure would like to be rescued wouldn't you?  In order to return to the Lord, I need to lay down my pride and my image. Sacrifice my image to the Lord, and return to Him.  Like any good sacrifice, if I give my image to Him, I know in my heart that He could make it something better than I could ever imagine it being.  Perhaps better than what it is now....

So I will keep waking up every morning and turn my heart to Him....because I believe that I will soon be given an opportunity to lay down my image.  To sacrifice my pride, and step into His identity for me.  

Sunday, February 5, 2017

Running Back To You


"She will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them. Then she will say, "I will go back to my husband as at first, for                       then I was better off than now" 

I must admit, this post sat in my drafts for a very very long time, or a version of this post anyways.  After IF: Gathering this past weekend, the post changed. It became something that I was proud to post.  Well I wouldn't call it proud...maybe it just finally seemed right.  I must also admit that I am vastly uncomfortable with this level of vulnerability.  This was a hard one to post.  

On my way home from the first night of IF: I was listening to worship music and it suddenly dawned on me something that I had learned that night, but maybe hadn't realized I had learned, or didn't expect to learn anyways.  It wasn't even anything that I suppose was directly spoken of by a speaker.  I suppose that it was a mostly a result of my heart being in a tender, broken place.  This was my first time attending an actual location for IF: and it was so refreshing to watch it with other women. Last year I watched alone on my laptop, and didn't expect there to be much of a difference.  There was.  

If you aren't familiar with the conference, at the end of the night, they took communion. Now, I have taken communion countless times, but this time was somehow different.  It felt sacred.  Before we look communion, we were asked to pray and repent of any sin, and to cleanse our heart before Him.  Now, here is where it gets interesting.  

I confessed my self-injury.  Now, I have confessed of this countless times, every time I did it, which is unfortunately more times than I could ever count.  This time was different though.  Suddenly, God whispered into my soul why it was so broken.  

Why are you not running to me? 


It hit me like a ton of bricks, bringing me immediately into tears and an overwhelming guilt.  I suddenly realized the real reason why what I was doing was so wrong.  When I was lacking, I didn't run to Him, I ran to a blade.  If I am being honest, up until this point I didn't really see a problem with what I was doing.  Yes, it wasn't healthy, but it just didn't seem wrong to me.  It helped me to get by.  When I crumbled, that was where I ran, I didn't run into His arms.  That was where the comfort and safety was all along.  The temporary comfort that I felt had become an idol to me.  It was a slavery that I didn't even know I was trapped in.  Now I do.  

So as I sat there in my seat, I felt all of these things and more...and I repented.  Maybe this means nothing, maybe the next time I struggle, I won't immediately run to him. Maybe next time I will run to one of my many temporary idols that promise comfort.  None of our idols provide the comfort that the enemy promises they will.  We all have that thing, that thing that soothes our soul and calms our spirit, but there is a reason that we have to keep running back to them.  We run back for more and every time we run back to it the more that we will need.  I want to continue to run to the One that can provide comfort. Who can take me in my broken moment and wrap His arms around me and speak into my brokenness.  Each time we drift away, may we always run back, to open arms waiting to redeem us. 

Lord, forgive me for running to anything that isn't you 

Thursday, February 2, 2017

Be Still

Something you should know about me, I am a chronic over sleeper.  Like it's a real problem for me.  I am late all of the time.  I am working on it, but it is definitely a work in progress. I am a work in progress.  People often tell me things start before they actually do in an effort to combat this, and sometimes I am still late even with the false start time.  I say all of this to show that I am really really excellent at rest.  It's a gift and I take my responsibility to use my "gift" very seriously.  What I am terrible at is holy rest.  Sabbath.  To be still.

Be Still....two little words with such big meaning. Two little words...that I have been seeing everywhere. In many different ways I have encountered these two little words or I have encountered books, podcasts, and posts that carry the same theme.  Themes such as be still, rest, Sabbath, and other such similar topics.  After a certain amount of times, I started to think to myself, perhaps I am supposed to be learning something here.  *sometimes it takes me awhile to get the message 

One of the ways that be still came up was in my bible study and bible reading.  I am doing the rhythm and grace study from Amen Paper Company and Psalms 46:10 was one of the verses.

"Be Still, and know that I am God"  

....seems pretty self explanatory to me, but oh how difficult it is to get this right in practice.  I mean what does it even mean to Be Still?

To figure out what this meant for me and my current walk, it took a bit more reading *and a few more reminders from God*  

I was listening to several podcasts a few days ago while I was sewing, one from Annie Downs and the other from Jess Connolly, both of them mentioned the ideas of Sabbath and a holy rest.  This is something that I personally am terrible at.  With anxiety, it is hard to shut myself down and to just be.  I am pretty terrible at it actually.  I don't mean just sitting around doing mindless instagram scrolling, I am great at that.  I am talking about sitting there and just being with Jesus.  Hearing what He has to say.  I am fantastic at rest, it's the holy rest I need to work on. So I decided to look into it, and try actually practicing a soul rest.

I am going to be working on what a soul rest actually looks like for me, and what the Bible says about it.  I am looking forward to delving into a holy rest, and growing even deeper in love with Jesus.

Friday, January 20, 2017


Like many people, every year I pick a word for the year.  A word that can set me up for the coming year. To realign my heart to where it needs to be.  It's not that I believe that there is something magical about the moment that the clock strikes midnight, but I do believe that the new year is a great time for self reflection. A time to reassess our hearts, our lives, and our relationship to God.  Last year, my word was Abide.  This year I chose the word retreat.

Last year, it seemed so clear to me what I wanted my word of the year to be, I mean, Abide seems like a pretty great thing to pursue and it's a word that I always felt a connection to.  This year though, I had no idea what word to choose, so I prayed about it.  It was then that the word retreat popped into my head, seemingly out of nowhere.  With this came instant confusion, certainly God was not calling me to focus on a word that implies quitting, or getting away.  I felt like I was trying to pursue the opposite of these things, so why would He give me that word.  So like anyone would, I googled, and I mean I googled hard.  Going deep into the word, searching it's meanings,  It was only then that it dawned on me that retreat was actually the perfect word that God had given to me.

  1. 1.
    (of an army) withdraw from enemy forces as a result of their superior power or after a defeat.

    "the French retreated in disarray"

    synonyms:withdrawretire, draw back, pull back/out, fall back, give way, give ground, beat a retreat, beat a hasty retreat
    "the army retreated"
  1. 1.
    an act of moving back or withdrawing.

    "a speedy retreat"

    synonyms:withdrawal, pulling back
    "the retreat of the army"
  2. 2.
    a signal for a military force to withdraw.

    "the bugle sounded a retreat"

What struck me was the "act of moving back or withdrawing".  One of my goals for the year had been to move away from things that were unhealthy for me, and to move towards things that were good for me.  To make healthy choices for myself physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  I wanted to retreat into God, and away from things that were pulling me down, keeping me from my best and most healthy self.  

After talking to a friend about my word for the year, He also pointed out the fact that when an army withdraws, it is not quitting, it is simply pulling back.  Pulling back to look at the problems, rest, and gather what they will need to go back into battle, I think we all could use a little of that in our lives don't you think.  To step back after a defeat, rest in God, and gather up the things we will need to go back into the battle.  If you look at the definition,  it is a withdraw from enemy forces as a result of their superior power or after a defeat.  When the evil of this world gets to be too much, rest in God.  When this world beats you down, and you face a defeat, rest in God.  It is such a beautiful attitude to have looking into this new year.  A withdraw isn't giving up, a withdraw is recognizing that if I keep going like this, I am going to lose.  Without Him, I will lose.  In life, doing this is an act of total surrender.  To look at the strength of the enemy and recognize your weakness, your 'not-enoughness'. We can rest in this weakness, because where we are weak He is strong, and there is nothing more comforting or energizing than that.   

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Prone To Wander

Prone To Wander...that is such a beautiful way to recognize the wandering hearts and minds of humanity isn't it.  When I hear those words, I don't just recognize my own wandering heart, it stirs an ache inside of me, knowing just how true those words are in my own life.

prone to wander
Lord I feel it
prone to leave
the God I love

This is why I chose to title the blog Prone To Wander, because it is true for me, it is true for us.  I want so many things for my life, and this phrase is a reminder how easily I can wander from God's will for my life.  It is a reminder of the fact that I am not enough.  A reminder of my need for Him.

I don't know for sure yet what I want this blog to be,  other than I want it to be a place where I can record my thoughts.  I have had a blog for many years, since I was in college, but that space didn't feel like me anymore.  So much change has occurred in my life since that time, I felt that I wanted a space to reflect that.  I love being able to have a space where I can look back and see what I was thinking years ago, it reminds me of who I was and how I can learn from that to become better.  It is also a way to record memories, I can look back and not only see memories from an event, but also my thoughts and feelings on it at the time.  I love that.  So I knew I wanted to continue doing that in some way.

I guess since this is a new space I should introduce myself, on the possibility that someone out there reading this doesn't know who I am. My name is Kayla Heffner.  I am 26 and I live in a small town in Ohio near Huntington, WV.  I work with a nonprofit, and I also have my own business.  I teach craft classes to women from the community and help them to make things, then I help them sell them, providing income to women who can rarely get jobs, and also building community.  Most of my time is spent at the nonprofit, spending time with my family there.

Right off the bat, I want to say as well that this blog is not the thoughts of some perfect Christian.  I am a pretty broken human being.  I have done things I regret, and there are so many times that I find myself wandering from who I am called to be...but I am learning.  This blog is the space of a believer who is in transit, who has yet to arrive.  I suppose we are all believers in transit,  everyone walking through life doing the best they can until we are called home.  I want to surround myself with people who are striving to make this life the best it can be.  Who are loving God, and loving the people around them.  This space will never be anything other than that.  I invite you to walk through this life with me.  Hopefully we all can learn something along the way, and together, we can all walk closer to Christ.

I look forward to walking this road with you.  Thanks for stopping by my friends.